Saturday, March 23, 2013

Home Education

I'll be the first to say that after one month of homeschooling I was ready to throw in the towel. I had NO IDEA how hard it was going to be. I had all of these thoughts going through my head (lies from the enemy) that I wasn't good enough or patient enough or smart enough, or laid-back enough, etc.  It really messed with me and I felt like if I continued on one more day I would certainly screw up my children for the rest of their lives. They would definitely grow to resent me for not giving them the 'normal' childhood and the classroom full of peers along with the teacher that was super put together with a great curriculum and as nice as pie. Dirty at recess, messy art projects and science experiments with actual 'equipment' that they could collaborate with other classmates on.

I struggled for weeks thinking this way. I laid in bed almost every night with tears running down my cheeks wondering if I was cut out for homeschooling. I'd wake up the next morning to start our day and things would run smoothly. I'd give myself pep talks about how it's a new day and I was going to be a great teacher for my boys and then...WHAM! Big brother would fall out of his chair and Zman would think it's time to put on his superman cape and fly his stuffed animal around the room... the thoughts creep in again. Those whispers that I'm not good enough. The feeling of defeat.

The truth is- those are LIES from satan. I know I'm not perfect and I know that I could certainly use a little more grace in the patients department, but I am not going to let lies defeat me. When praying about the decision to homeschool or not, my husband and I did everything to make sure we heard from the Lord. We've always had that on our hearts and the closer it came for Big Brother to enter Kindergarten the more real it got. The sleepless nights, meeting with friends to pray, the pros & cons lists were just the start. In the end, we really feel like this is what the Lord is calling us to- and that's enough.

God doesn't want us thinking about anything by default. Just because *most* kids are taught outside the home, doesn't mean that it's 'right'. God commands us to be transformed by renewing our minds with His truth so we can think like He thinks and that includes our thoughts on parenting and education.  I simply cannot imagine sending our children to school for MOST of the day for MOST of their childhood in an atmosphere that is not centered around Jesus.  Our children are treasures entrusted to us by God and He has given them to us to invest for eternity.  I can go on forever about our conviction to homeschool and I know that we said that we were going to take it year by year and child by child but the more I'm in the Word and the more God speaks to us we are positive that we are supposed to homeschool for this season and that is such a beautiful feeling when things get tough.
My little reader ;o)

Things have been getting better and better around here. Routine has been key for us and we just started a new curriculum last week that we so far LOVE. I'm sure a lot more of my posts on here will be homeschool related because let's be honest...it takes up about 80% of my day!

No comments:

Post a Comment